Beth Ditto Tells It

In my last blog, I wrote about how women tend to obsess about their weight and how our brain space can be consumed with thinking about how we look (often in a negative way). The latest Frankie magazine features an interview with Beth Ditto of Gossip, and something she said really connects to that idea:

“I was tired of seeing women tear themselves up and not move forward because they couldn’t be smaller. I didn’t understand that. I didn’t understand the idea how smaller meant bigger in a weird way: that being smaller meant you were a bigger person and got more options, or more this, or more that. I refused to accept it. I refused to accept that was the only way I would be appreciated, and that I would ever appreciate myself. There’s so much more to me than physical appearance. There is so much inside of you that is worth being listened to. When you’re so busy thinking about how much space you’re taking up – whether it’s too much or not enough – you won’t get to express those things, ever. And I think that’s one of the biggest cycles of sexism: everyone is constantly being distracted by appearance. And everyone is subjected to that: men, women, everyone. You can’t just exist, you have to be just so. And I still don’t get that. What I do understand, is that you have the power to see the world through your own eyes and you don’t always have to see it through other people’s. You create your own vision.”

She makes a fair point! When your mind is busy THINKING about your size, you’re not thinking about anything else! Beth said, “There is so much inside of you that is worth being listened to”, but if all you think about is your weight, you are not accessing all there is for you to offer. For starters, you’re so busy thinking about YOURSELF that your influence in the world diminishes. It’s an interesting thought. “Everyone is constantly being distracted by appearance”. If we weren’t so distracted by appearance, perhaps our thoughts would be more inventive, more creative, more innovative, more useful; at the very least, we’d be more interesting! Beth is right – there is so much more to us than physical appearance. So why don’t we believe that? There are whole feminist books devoted to that topic, but for now, what we can do, is dedicate our minds to “creating our own vision”. That means choosing to love your body NOW, not obsessing over weight, and basically, getting on with life!