Post Office Conversations

Dress: Hell Bunny

 

Plus size girls seek out plus size blogs for ideas, styles, a community...to not feel so damn alone in their fatness and dealing with the crap that goes with it. Marya Hornbacher, Wasted, writes that Anorexics and bulimics do the opposite - their struggle is very private and they hide it from others. At the end of the day, obesity and anorexia are just two extremes of the spectrum, but share a striking similarity. Obsession with weight. When I say obsession, I mean that thinking about your weight can take up most of your brain space. Thinking about food, thinking about NOT eating food - at the end of the day it's still thinking about food. And for many people, of all different body shapes and sizes, thinking about food brings on feelings of panic and paranoia. The fear of losing control. And gaining weight. Marya Hornbacher writes about her decision to overcome her eating disorder. She says, 

"And when you decide you are tired of being alone with your sickness, you go out seeking women friends, people who you believe can show you by example how to eat, how to live - and you find that by and large most women are obsessed with their weight. It's a little discouraging."

It's true. 

A page later,

"Women use their obsession with weight and food as a point of connection with one another, a commonality even between strangers. Instead of talking about why we use food and weight control as a means of handling emotional stress, we talk ad nauseam about the fact that we don't like our bodies. When you decide not to do that, you begin to notice how constant that talk is. I go to the gym, and women are standing around in their underwear bitching about their bellies, I go to a restaurant and listen to women cheerfully conversing about their latest diet, I go to a women's clothing store and the woman helping me, almost universally, will launch into a monologue about how these pants are very slimming, how lucky I am to have the problem of never being able to find clothes that fit, 'because you're tiny!' she'll squeal. I have to remind myself that it's not a conversation I want to get into. I refuse to say, 'Gee, thanks.' I don't necessarily want pants that are slimming. I don't want to look like the photos of skeletal models on the walls. Wanting to be healthy is seen as really weird."

I love that. I love the part where she says that when you decide not to talk about not liking your body, it brings a shift to your life. I've had to make that decision daily. My weight shouldn't be this fanatical daily stress. A number on the scale shouldn't rule your life; healthiness and balance is a better goal.

Yesterday I was standing in line at the post office. There was some Kinder chocolate strategically placed next to the queue, with a specials sign, "Only 99c". The lady in front of me commented on it, "They know exactly where to put them, don't they?" she said, rolling her eyes. She gave a big gusty sigh and made a show of "giving in" and grabbing one. We had a chuckle together. Then the lady behind me joined in and grabbed one too, saying, "Oh, I may as well, too." Caught up in the fun of it, I took one as well and said, "Oh, I will too then." It was a nice moment among strangers, but looking back, I wonder about the drama of it. Everyone, stop what you're doing. Earth, stop spinning. Three women gave into their desires and bought chocolate! A revolution has begun, women are losing control! 

Why is it that women buying chocolate is so bloody taboo that when we sense someone watching, we feel the need to confess to complete strangers our "lack of control" and the fact that we're "giving in to temptation". Give me a break. 

So to end that rant, here's what I wore to work today.

Dress: ASOS

Belt: City Chic

Necklace: Dangerfield
Collar Tips: Ebay

Shoes: Target, Hot Options